5 Things Not to Do After a Wake Up Call Knocked On Your Beautiful Life

An incident, a situation, an event or a shock that has left you feeling like everything has changed in the flash of a moment is a Wake Up call. It is an experience that rocks you to your core. 

If you have received a Wake Up call and you feel like you don’t know which way to turn, be aware that self-sabotaging behaviors lurk in the crevices of painful experiences. 

Methods of coping that have gotten you through life thus far may need to be updated for the next level of experiences.

If you have experienced: 

the recent death of a loved one

the breakup of a long term relationship

a serious medical diagnosis

loss of a job or career path 

5 things not to do when a Wake Up call comes knocking on your beautiful life:

▼   Don’t try to avoid the pain that you feel. The way to cope with a life changing event is to pass through it, work with your emotions, instead of trying to avoid the pain. Responses to grief and loss are very personal. Incredible growth can come from being present and developing the mental strength. Growth is a potential from painful experiences,

▼   Don’t try to numb your emotions. Your emotions are incredibly valuable in informing you of how you’re doing. Numbing behaviors include: taking substances, over eating, over sleeping, over shopping, over scrolling. 

▼   Don’t push yourself to be how you used to be. Give yourself some space and time to heal from the experience that has changed your life. Find those people whom you feel are ‘safe’, with whom you can share authentically and who don’t want to ‘fix' you. Revisit your spiritual beliefs and commitments.

▼     Don’t focus too much on the past or the future. Practice a ‘be here now’ mentality. Don’t spend too much time hashing over the details of what happened. Don’t worry too much about the distant future. Avoid words like ‘always’, and ‘never’. Example: I will never feel joy again. Instead: I don’t feel joy now. At a time of chaos, finding structure can be very useful. Join a group dealing with a similar issue, create healthy habits, exercise regularly.

▼     Do not make major life-changing decisions, unless you have to. When a life-changing experience has changed your life dramatically, it will take some healing to be able to assess what your needs are going forward. Imagine you have just had a major surgery. Healing takes time and effort. With open energy as opposed to narrow, closed, thinking, you will survive and thrive this Wake Up call.  

Mantras

It sounds simplistic to adopt a mantra when a very difficult experience has impacted your beautiful life. The mantras, ’one step at a time’, or ‘one day at a time’, can help ease thought that cause anxiety. Better yet if you find your own mantra to help you through. 

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When a Wake Up Call knocks on your beautiful life

Have you had an incident, a situation, an event or a shock that has left you feeling like, everything has just changed in the flash of a moment? A event that left you feeling like your life will never be the same? 

If so, you have received a Wake up Call. A Wake Up Call stops you in your tracks. You don’t know how to continue but you know that the path ahead has changed drastically. You cannot continue in the direction that you were going and the reality of the past feels like it is quickly falling apart.

There are many different experiences that can cause a Wake Up Call. For example, your life partner announces that they have changed their mind and want out of the relationship. Or the start-up that you started is failing. Or your boss informs you that the company is downsizing and you don’t need to come in to work on Monday. 

A Wake Up Call could come from the sudden death of a loved one, or a terminal illness diagnosis from a doctor. A Wake Up Call is usually not something that you want to embrace because it inevitably involves changes that are unwanted and out of your control.

What to do when a Wake Up Call comes knocking on your beautiful life? 

When a Wake Up Call comes knocking it can bring grief, trauma, sadness, shame, and/or psychological and/or physical pain. Our human desire to resist change can cause feelings of overwhelm, exhaustion and isolation. The concept of letting go seems ridiculous because what you want in the moment is to hold onto the way things have been.

5 things to do when a Wake Up Call comes knocking on your life:

▼    Breathe. This sounds simplistic but calming yourself will go a long way in reducing stress. If focused breathing is foreign to you, try this. Square breathing starts with taking in breath slowly for a count of say 4. After inhaling to the count of 4, hold your breath for 4 counts. Then slowly release your breath for the count of 4 and then hold again at the bottom before inhaling again. (The count can be adjusted as needed.)

▼    Space. Give yourself some space to process what is happening with people in your inner circle whom you trust and whom you know care about you. 

▼    Journal. Write everything that you are feeling in a journal, in a stream of consciousness sort of way. Don’t filter and don’t judge your feelings. Don’t share your journal with anyone, unless you are in therapy.

▼    Reflect. Explore the deeper meaning that emerges from the events that have taken place. This requires being the observer of you. Almost like part of you is neutral, non judgmental assessing what happened. Continue to ask yourself … “What do I feel now”? Take ownership of authentic feelings, knowing that they will evolve and change over time. Sometimes metaphors can be very helpful in describing how you feel.

▼    Additional change. Don’t make any additional changes until your life has calmed down. Try not to be reactionary to the event that happened, unless additional change is necessary for safety. If you must make additional changes, keep them to a minimum. 

These 5 steps will help you to cope with the initial stages of a A Wake Up Call.

Next time: 5 things not to do when a wake up call knocks on your beautiful life.